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You can't fall off the floor.
Children need three years to learn the law of gender.
One child in the house is not enough, but two is too much.
The child will not spill or spill anything on a dirty floor.
An unbreakable toy is useful for smashing others with it.
1. A child chatting at home without a break will categorically refuse to utter a word at a party.
2. Any shy child will choose a crowded place to loudly demonstrate the newly acquired vocabulary ("damn it", etc.).
1. The likelihood that the cat will eat the offered food has nothing to do with the price of the latter.
2. The likelihood that a family pet (cat or dog) will make a noise running in and out of the room is directly proportional to the number and importance of guests invited to dinner.
No matter which side of the door the cat or dog is on, they are always in the wrong place.
Any horizontal surface will soon build up.
The length of a minute depends on which side of the bathroom door you are on.
Time goes slower in a fast-moving carriage.
The probable lifespan of a houseplant is inversely proportional to its price and directly proportional to its unattractive appearance.
1. If you have already watched some part of the series on TV and suddenly watch it again, you will find yourself on a repeat of the same episode.
2. Two interesting programs are always broadcast at the same time.
3. The only broadcast of interest will be canceled.
4. The program you have been waiting for all week will be shown earlier than it appears in the program.
1. The phone will ring when you are in front of the apartment and try unsuccessfully to open it.
2. You grab the handset just when the hang-up signals sound in it.
If the wrong number is dialed, there will never be a busy tone.
Shopping strives to fill all available storage space.
The stomach stretches to accept all the food that is useless from the point of view of adults (lemonade, Pepsi-Cola, candy, etc.).
When the body is submerged in water, the phone rings.
When you go on vacation, take twice as much money as your belongings.
Nothing can be done in one trip.
The most fussy person will surely come across a coffee cup with a chink, a glass of lipstick or hair in soup.
Whenever you turn on the radio, you always hear the last notes of your favorite song.
When there is enough money in the bank, the bills are paid in two weeks, if there is little money the next day.
The quality of the product is inversely proportional to the size of the store.
Never invest in anything that bites.
The book you paid $ 10.95 for today will be released tomorrow in paperback.
1. Stores selling the first book will not have the second.
2. The stores selling the second book will not be the first.
3. Ed Murphy has never heard of any of these books.
The higher the value of the product, the further it has to be sent for repair.
What you need is never on sale.
What you can afford to buy, you do not want to buy.
If the product label says: "For any size" - know that this thing will not suit anyone.
1. Never ask the hairdresser if you need a haircut.
2. Never ask the seller if he is asking too much for the product.
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It is absolutely useless.